You may be in an Airplane Crash...

And Other Conspiracy Theories you’re gonna get Gulag’d for.

Besides being a French Foreign Legionnaire, my Dad was also an Airline Pilot from the groovy 60’s onward. My mom was an Air Hostess with the white gloves even. They were cool and let me draft along in their jet stream. That was my upbringing. My Dad was smart and considered by many to be one of the finest aviators in the world. People who knew him still tell me how much in awe of him, his expertise and experiences, they still are. He knew everything about every commercial aircraft, save the Concord, and he’d either been a Captain or First Officer from the DC-3 on to the rest of all that beautiful gleaming jet age tin.

He was always teaching me how to survive because his life had often been one of desperate survival from the sands of the Sahara to a fog shrouded LA basin trying to shoot a dangerous IFR approach with an aircraft that had lost hydraulics. One of the things he would constantly tell me was that if I were ever to find myself in a horrible air disaster, and the aircraft did actually manage to make it the ground mostly, that I was to immediately panic and do everything possible to save my life in the seconds left I might have to live.

”Don’t wait for someone to give you permission to clear the aircraft. They could be stupid and not realize how bad the situation is. Smoke in the cabin. Flaming avgas on the tarmac. They could be trying to save themselves and their family and friends first before they do their job. They could be paralyzed by fear. Don’t wait. Get yourself out of that death trap by any means possible. Politeness kills. Get out, run for all your worth, and don’t look back because that thing could explode at any second.”

He regularly lectured me constantly on crash landings and the other joys of modern air travel. With all the gravitas of some Old Testament prophet warning plague and eternal damnation he exposed me to what few air travelers ever consider. From the age of 6 in vans and OP shorts dragging a Hobie skateboard into his study until the last week of his life on Earth when I was just getting published at Harper Collins and he wanted to go into a bookstore and see one of my books on the shelf, he explained to me what was really going behind the illusion we’re sold.

Things aren’t as safe as you’re constantly led to believe.

Airplane crashes, and he’d been in one, obsessed our family. We watched them on TV like some families live for the SuperDuperBowl. We’d lost friends in some and many were the night I sat around the dining room table deep into the late hours listening to cargo pilots and Flying Tigers recount horrific air crashes from The Canary Islands to the Sierra Madres. Dissecting every moment that had led to that final moment of flight for some doomed air crew and passengers. Hangar flying how it had all gone horribly wrong for beautiful gleaming machines and fellow ghostly aviators that were now like heroes, or in some cases fools.

But back to crashes and enough about my idyllic Southern California in the 70’s childhood.

My Dad realized that people are often dumb, disingenuous, and unable. That a position, a uniform, and even authority don’t necessarily mean anything in a disaster. He constantly mistrusted the herd oft illuminated by other stories he told me, acquired from almost every heart of darkness in this strange world, screamed how desperately he’d learned to mistrust the herd, the potentate, and pretty much everyone, along the way.

Why tell you all this now? Because I think we, America, might currently be, possibly, in an airplane crash. Smoke in the cabin. Flaming avgas licking at the fuselage. Pretty air hostesses telling us to remain calm while we wait for “help.” Within the span of a year we’ve…

• Held an, at best, dubious national election.

• Participated in a world wide Science experiment with zero legal recourse should some of us grow a prehensile tail, or suddenly start having heart attacks and embolisms like some have.

• Watched our freedom to assemble, attend church, speak freely, and even own weapons, just disappear.

• Witness a racist power structure vilify large swathes of the population based merely on the amount of melatonin in the skin.

• See cities burned, shops destroyed, malls looted, citizens murdered, night after night for months on end on major cities gone completely and utterly lawless if only to destroy an OrangeManVeryBad™️.
  What was considered abhorrent last year is unremarked and even encouraged this year. Teens love to Knife Fight we’re told, and the police who try to save their lives are the criminals?

• We’ve also come to understand that Four Big Tech companies, supported by Media and Hollywood are actually now THE GOVERNMENT in the form of a Cabal, with the power to silence a President.

• Watched the servants of this Cabal lie constantly, and then never face a single moment of accountability even when rogue journalism catches them red-handed, pants down, in front of us all.

• Add $6 Tril in funny money to the Nat Debt, rapidly accelerating inflation and a ClownShow emphasis on ridiculousnesses like “Trans Rights” to distract you from domestic power grabs and aggressive foreign regimes and buddy, or baby, your ripe for some kind of “Hey we need to take more control of everything including the banks and your money” crises from the The Tyranny that Cares™️

Governors mad with power, killing our elderly, and acting like petty vengeful third world dictators while The President* talks about going to war on American industry in the name of the Weather Kult. That is, when he’s not babbling nonsense because of his supposed stutter, or so we’re told.

And now this:

Let me spell this out for you… The Governor of California put a military jet fighter on alert because American citizens were protesting his policies. Which they have a legal right to do.

For what? Close air support? Gun runs on MAGA bros in Huntington Beach who don’t wanna wear masks?

So we have to ask? Did Newsom jump the gun? Has this been the plan all along? Move from pandemic panic and fear to divisional riots and finally election shenanigans to slow-boil us all for the Big Martial Law they truly want so we never have to do those pesky elections again?

And of course the Deplorables are gonna stand up. Fight back. Assert their God given rights. And if they don’t, we’ll, you can just lie about it and pretend it happened anyway because you needed it to happen to authorize the gun run for the Air Guard jet you ordered on station. Lie about “people dying” and “cops getting their brains bashed in with a fire extinguisher” at the Capitol “Insurrection.”

Because that’s what they do? They just lie. All the time now. For power. That’s not in dispute. That’s not even in question and they’re not actually denying it.

The only thing, right now on the One Minute to Freedom Doomsday Clock that is in dispute is this… are you in an airplane crash?